Bullying Starts at Home: How to Help Your Young Child Understand That Bullying Is Bad

Inside: Help your young child understand that bullying is bad with these 10 practical tips. Learn how to teach empathy, model kindness, and guide your child toward positive behaviors for a bullying-free future.

Would you ever believe that bullying behaviors might start at home? 

It can be surprising, even unsettling, to think about. But for young children, those small, seemingly harmless actions like grabbing toys, pushing during play, or calling names can lay the groundwork for bullying if left unchecked. 

The good news? As parents, we have the power to set the tone early and guide our little ones toward kindness and empathy.

Here’s how you can help your child understand that bullying is never okay.

What is Bullying?

For young children, bullying might not look like the repeated aggressive behaviors we associate with older kids. 

It’s subtler but still significant. Think about situations like:

  • Grabbing toys from peers without permission.
  • Pushing or hitting during playtime.
  • Calling others names or excluding them.

These actions might seem minor now, but if they become patterns, they can escalate. Addressing these behaviors early gives you the chance to redirect them and teach your child positive ways to interact. 

That said, it’s important not to overthink or panic every time your child grabs a toy or struggles to share or do something that is “not right”. You might even be wondering What to Do When You Find Out Your Child Is Bullying Others.

These moments are normal for young children, whose brains are still developing the ability to process emotions and understand empathy. 

Scolding or labeling them as a “bully” at this stage can do more harm than good. Instead, use these moments as opportunities to gently guide and teach your child about kindness and sharing. 

But keep in mind that learning empathy is a gradual process.

To help you with this process, here is a list of 10 things you must do at home to ensure your child understands bullying is bad and not go into it.

1. Set the Example at Home

Your child watches and learns from you more than anyone else. Show them how to handle conflicts calmly and treat others with respect.

  • Use polite words like “please” and “thank you.”
  • Apologize when you make a mistake.
  • Model kindness even during disagreements.

Your everyday actions speak louder than any lesson you try to teach.

2. Teach Empathy Through Simple Activities

Young children might not fully understand how their actions affect others. Help them develop empathy in ways they can grasp:

  • Role-Playing: Use toys to act out scenarios where one toy hurts another. Ask, “How do you think this toy feels?”
  • Books and Stories: Choose stories about kindness and discuss how characters feel. Ask questions like, “Why do you think they did that?”
  • Observation: Point out acts of kindness in everyday life and praise those behaviors.
role play to teach empathy

These small exercises help your child connect their actions to other people’s emotions. You can also try these 10 Simple Ways to Teach Empathy to Young Children

3. Explain What Bullying Means

Your child might not realize that certain behaviors are considered bullying. Use simple language they can understand:

“Bullying is when someone hurts another person on purpose, like hitting, taking their toys, or saying mean words. It makes people feel sad or scared, and we don’t want anyone to feel that way.”

Clarity helps your child see the difference between playful teasing and hurtful behavior.

4. Encourage Sharing and Cooperation

Social skills like sharing and taking turns are crucial in preventing bullying. Practice these skills at home:

  • Play games that require turn-taking.
  • Praise your child when they share or include others in their play.
  • Teach them phrases like, “Can I have a turn?” or “Would you like to play with me?”

Positive reinforcement encourages them to keep up these good habits.

kids sharing

5. Address Aggressive Behavior Immediately

When your child acts out aggressively, don’t ignore it. Step in calmly but firmly:

  • Describe what happened: “You grabbed the toy from your friend.”
  • Explain the impact: “That made your friend feel upset.”
  • Offer a solution: “Next time, ask if you can have a turn.”

Consistency is key in reinforcing the message that aggression is not acceptable.

6. Create a Safe Environment for Open Communication

Children often act out when they’re frustrated, scared, or don’t know how to express their feelings. 

Help them label their emotions

Make sure your home feels like a safe space for them to share. Here are a few things you can do righ from the start.

  • Ask open-ended questions: “How was your day?” or “What made you happy today?”
  • Help them label their emotions: “Are you feeling upset because you had to wait your turn?”
  • Listen without judgment and guide them toward healthier ways to express themselves.

7. Highlight the Importance of Kindness

Kindness is the antidote to bullying. Use everyday moments to talk about its value:

  • Praise kind actions: “It was so thoughtful of you to share your crayons.”
  • Point out kindness in others: “Did you see how your friend helped pick up the toys? That was really nice.”
  • Start a “kindness jar” where your child adds a token for each kind act they do.

8. Address Bullying in Media

Children’s shows and books often depict bullying. Use these as teachable moments:

  • Ask, “How do you think that character felt when they were teased?”
  • Discuss what the characters could have done differently.

This helps your child recognize bullying and think critically about its impact.

9. Monitor Their Interactions

Pay attention to how your child interacts with siblings, friends, and peers. Look for patterns of controlling or aggressive behavior and address them as they arise. Don’t hesitate to involve teachers or caregivers if necessary.

10. Reinforce Positive Behaviors

When your child demonstrates kindness, cooperation, or empathy, celebrate it:

  • Use simple praise: “I’m proud of you for helping your friend.”
  • Offer small rewards for consistent positive behavior.

Positive reinforcement shapes their understanding of what is valued and expected.

Here are 5 ways to reinforce positive behavior in toddlers (Without Rewards or Stickers)

Bullying Prevention Starts Early

If you are still reading this, I can assure you, you are somone ready to give your child the tools they need to grow into a kind and empathetic individual. 

These 10 things can be great ways to ensure your child is strongly against bullying when they grow up.

Remember, young children might not always understand the consequences of their actions. With patience, guidance, and consistent effort, you can help your child build the social and emotional skills needed to treat others with kindness.

Start these conversations early, and you’ll set your child on a path to positively impact the world around them.